Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post - How does an unattractive female find value in herself and find a place in this world?

Agota · 09-25-2011, 08:01 PM

I believe the main problem is that you consider yourself to be unattractive.

I believe that you're familiar with the concept of the Law of Attraction, which states that like attracts like. When you have such a strong belief that you're unattractive, you're broadcasting a very strong vibe "I'm unattractive". Your physical reality always matches your dominant vibe by bringing you the situations and people who reflect it. Therefore, when you believe so strongly that you're unattractive, you look at the mirror and see yourself as such, you meet all kinds of jerks who call you ugly and men don't seem to notice you. This only reinforces your belief that you're unattractive aka strengthens the "I'm unattractive" vibe you're broadcasting, which results in even more jerks and even less positive attention from men. It's not an "objective reality" though: you've created a monster that is torturing you yourself. I suggest you to start reading as much as you can on LoA: you can go to Deliberate Receiving.com and download the free e-book/audio book, it's really nice and LoA is explained in a way that makes sense as promised. Then, watch motive "The Secret". Then, read Abraham-Hicks books. Once you get the way LoA works, you'll realize that you have created these unpleasant experiences with all the "I'm unattractive" thoughts. The good thing is that once you understand the Law of Attraction, you can start consciously creating your reality, which is awesome

Also, even from a simple psychological perspective, events by themselves are meaningless, it's our interpretation of the events that makes them positive or negative. When you're so convinced that you're unattractive, you will see proof for that everywhere simply because you'll interpret an event this way. You walk down the street, guys aren't looking at you, you think "I'm so ugly that they won't even look at me!", then a supermodel walks down the street, guys aren't looking at her, she thinks "I'm so pretty that men are intimidated by my beauty!". It's the exactly same situation, yet interpretations of it are direct opposites because the beliefs of you and a supermodel are direct opposite. How do you know that those guys that won't look at you aren't drooling over your ass once you walk past them? You don't.

It's up to you to choose whether you believe you're beautiful or ugly. It might seem that there are subjective measures, but really it's all in your head. There are fat girls who think they're the **** and guys are chasing them and there are girls who would fit the conventional concept of beauty but they think they're ugly and guys don't seem to notice them. Think about, if there's really no objective reality and you can choose whether you think that you're ugly or you think that you're pretty, well, what do you want to choose? I can tell you that life is much more fun when you think that you're pretty

In reality, there will always be people who think that there's something wrong with you. There will be people who think that you're either too fin or too fat, that your boobs are either too small or too big, that your hair is too long or too short, etc. They have a right to have their personal opinions. You have a right to ignore them.

Think about it: even Hollywood stars who are voted as the sexiest people on Earth are not attractive to everyone. I bet that there are a lot of people who think that Jessica Alba is ugly. I certainly know that there are people who think that Nicole Sherzinger from Pussycat Dolls is ugly: one of my friends thinks exactly that and another friend refers to her as "that vulgar gipsy". Even people who perfectly fit into the common concept of attractive are not attractive to everyone. Why? Mainly because it's impossible to please everyone and the sooner you realize that, the better.

Also, c'mon, it's very difficult for a woman who wants to be attractive remain unattractive. I mean, get in shape, get nice clothes, get a nice haircut, get a tan, whiten your teeth, etc. I have a strong belief that all women are beautiful, it's simply that the beauty is either in them as unexpressed potential or expressed potential.

Someone asked you why you think you're unattractive, your vague answer simply shows that you don't really know yourself. Try it, describe to us why you think you're unattractive. There are very few things that can't be improved nowadays

Also, c'mon, you're saying that you have an awkward nose, you know, Penelope Cruz have a very strange nose. She's also hot as a stove! There are a lot of people who are considered to be very attractive worldwide although their faces are not typical "Hollywood Barbie/Hollywood Ken" faces.

09-25-2011, 08:01 PM	#5 (permalink)
Agota Family Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Barleylands, United Kingdom Posts: 1,257	I believe the main problem is that you consider yourself to be unattractive. I believe that you're familiar with the concept of the Law of Attraction, which states that like attracts like. When you have such a strong belief that you're unattractive, you're broadcasting a very strong vibe "I'm unattractive". Your physical reality always matches your dominant vibe by bringing you the situations and people who reflect it. Therefore, when you believe so strongly that you're unattractive, you look at the mirror and see yourself as such, you meet all kinds of jerks who call you ugly and men don't seem to notice you. This only reinforces your belief that you're unattractive aka strengthens the "I'm unattractive" vibe you're broadcasting, which results in even more jerks and even less positive attention from men. It's not an "objective reality" though: you've created a monster that is torturing you yourself. I suggest you to start reading as much as you can on LoA: you can go to Deliberate Receiving.com and download the free e-book/audio book, it's really nice and LoA is explained in a way that makes sense as promised. Then, watch motive "The Secret". Then, read Abraham-Hicks books. Once you get the way LoA works, you'll realize that you have created these unpleasant experiences with all the "I'm unattractive" thoughts. The good thing is that once you understand the Law of Attraction, you can start consciously creating your reality, which is awesome Also, even from a simple psychological perspective, events by themselves are meaningless, it's our interpretation of the events that makes them positive or negative. When you're so convinced that you're unattractive, you will see proof for that everywhere simply because you'll interpret an event this way. You walk down the street, guys aren't looking at you, you think "I'm so ugly that they won't even look at me!", then a supermodel walks down the street, guys aren't looking at her, she thinks "I'm so pretty that men are intimidated by my beauty!". It's the exactly same situation, yet interpretations of it are direct opposites because the beliefs of you and a supermodel are direct opposite. How do you know that those guys that won't look at you aren't drooling over your ass once you walk past them? You don't. It's up to you to choose whether you believe you're beautiful or ugly. It might seem that there are subjective measures, but really it's all in your head. There are fat girls who think they're the **** and guys are chasing them and there are girls who would fit the conventional concept of beauty but they think they're ugly and guys don't seem to notice them. Think about, if there's really no objective reality and you can choose whether you think that you're ugly or you think that you're pretty, well, what do you want to choose? I can tell you that life is much more fun when you think that you're pretty In reality, there will always be people who think that there's something wrong with you. There will be people who think that you're either too fin or too fat, that your boobs are either too small or too big, that your hair is too long or too short, etc. They have a right to have their personal opinions. You have a right to ignore them. Think about it: even Hollywood stars who are voted as the sexiest people on Earth are not attractive to everyone. I bet that there are a lot of people who think that Jessica Alba is ugly. I certainly know that there are people who think that Nicole Sherzinger from Pussycat Dolls is ugly: one of my friends thinks exactly that and another friend refers to her as "that vulgar gipsy". Even people who perfectly fit into the common concept of attractive are not attractive to everyone. Why? Mainly because it's impossible to please everyone and the sooner you realize that, the better. Also, c'mon, it's very difficult for a woman who wants to be attractive remain unattractive. I mean, get in shape, get nice clothes, get a nice haircut, get a tan, whiten your teeth, etc. I have a strong belief that all women are beautiful, it's simply that the beauty is either in them as unexpressed potential or expressed potential. Someone asked you why you think you're unattractive, your vague answer simply shows that you don't really know yourself. Try it, describe to us why you think you're unattractive. There are very few things that can't be improved nowadays Also, c'mon, you're saying that you have an awkward nose, you know, Penelope Cruz have a very strange nose. She's also hot as a stove! There are a lot of people who are considered to be very attractive worldwide although their faces are not typical "Hollywood Barbie/Hollywood Ken" faces. Last edited by Agota; 09-25-2011 at 08:32 PM.