Ive manifested 2 dates in the last 36 hours. Thats more than Ive had in the past year (Ive had romantic flings but not dates)
Im glad though that Im clear with what I want so when I meet someone I can know if they are for me fast, instead of wasting time with them...
Both were high quality men. And respectful and smart
The 1st was warm and smart, but Im not interested in because... its just not it. Maybe no attraction, maybe he was complaining too much about his roommate (at age 40) and too much of a victim. He already texted me that he'd love to see me again...but no.
The 2nd one was such a handsome man, I could look at him for hours... Also super smart. Same field as me. We laughed a lot. Yes, I liked him a lot. The dream man...But.. When the bill came he split it with me
and kissed me on the cheek. That says it all... no?
In fact Im pretty sure I saw on his fb profile that hes in a relationship. (but Im no longer on fb so I couldnt make sure). Why did he ask me out? I dont know. Maybe for professional reasons.
He too wrote that hed like to meet again....
But in both cases, even though they are "close" its not right. Im glad that Im honest enough with myself to see that and move on and not let my self esteem be affected.
In fact after date #2, I walked home and saw a beautiful bouquet of flowers in the deli, which i bought for myself.
I will work on believing that a guy like #2 would want me as much as guy #1.
I still need to work on my beliefs that I deserve a great guy and a great guy will really want to be with me. I can sense that Im not there yet.