View Single Post
  #18 (permalink)  
Old 07-19-2007, 07:58 PM
medaille medaille is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 104
medaille is on a distinguished road
Default

I don't think status is an absolute value. A lot of it is relative to the other people you are around. If you are surrounded by people of perceived higher value than you are you will tend to display signs of lower value and vice versa.

I really think we need to get rid of this fear of labeling people. Most people here are smart enough to understand that a label is representative of something rather than an absolute term. Nitpicking language to death is a sure fire way to limit conversation.

example:
Quote:
"It depends on what the meaning of the words 'is' is." –Bill Clinton, during his 1998 grand jury testimony on the Monica Lewinsky affair
I'm going to sound conservative for saying this, but we're not all perfect beings (read: god), so we need to be able to talk about these things. We can't just pretend that everything is ok with everyone and we're all just a product of society. People do have "self-esteem issues." I don't care how they got them or that it wasn't their fault that they have them. It does no one any good to pretend they don't exist.

I agree with the idea that you shouldn't try to change people. They need to change themselves. I've been watching the Dog Whisperer for a while, and I think a lot of his techniques should be applied to humans. More leading and less commenting (inaction or critquing). It does no good to tell others that they should change, but at the same time it does no good to just ignore the whole situation.

You are who you are surrounded by. Part of being a social animal is that you absorb the traits of those around you. Part of being unable to fulfill yourself is that you must look outside to fulfill yourself. We all project our own beliefs about ourselves onto other people and we all absorb the beliefs of others and incorporate them into our own model of reality. I don't think it is unreasonable to come to the conclusion that "... they just try to drag you down." This does happen if you aren't consciously aware of it.

I wouldn't consider myself high-status yet, but I'm working on it. I feel very aware of how much effect low status people have on me, because I'm constantly flipping back and forth between low and high status states depending on who I'm hanging around with. It takes a little while to regroup and isolate your state from their state if you weren't consciously aware of it.
Reply With Quote