Hi, Kazeko!
This is just my impression, but your post makes it sound like that you can find clarity on a map. You plan a way to get there, get on a car or plane, and then, boom, there you are: Clarity!
Clarity doesn't work like that. Clarity is something you will be working on for the rest of your life, just like your alcohol addiction. Sometimes, everything will be crystal clear. Other times, it will be fuzzy and muddy. That's just the way it is. Sure, things will become clearer over time, but I really think we can't attain clarity until after we die. Just like we can't really judge a movie well until we've seen it from start to finish, we can't really judge life as we're living it, either.
However, I do think there is some method to the madness of clarity. sranganayaki asked some good questions that are worth pondering. Just keep working on yourself and set some goals you are serious about attaining. I think you'll find clarity better that way. |