Let's focus on the writing then.
I'm not a huge reader, but I've seen many a movie with dark, twisted plots. Characters exploring their dark sides, behaving violently, cruelly etc..
Somebody wrote those screenplays - or adapted them from books or articles, or whatever.
So, from your last post - it seems you are happy to view your nightmares as creative juices. Why not just see them as that? We are all capable of imagining ourselves doing all manner of stuff - but we don't generally do them - thankfully.
I'm not taking anthing away from your emotion response to the dreams. But that's the same of any form of good story telling isn't it? To provoke an emotional response. I'd be more worried if your dreams had no impact on you whatsoever, of if I watched a nasty scene in a movie and was completely impassive.
Ne Cede Malis