I'm actually not very nervous because of where I place my trust. I have the occasional fear because I feel presence in my room which my mind cannot understand. I have been conditioned to fear anything that I can't understand, but as I begin to let go and let God I find that life is very peaceful and beautiful and marvelous (though the disconnect can bring me down)! I have some of the most amazing sleep where my body wakes up feeling light and at peace. It's like being a child again!!!
I also feel a greater connection to nature. I often find myself just wanting to sit in nature and watch it. I watch trees, plants, the sky, the birds, the way they move and I just marvel at the beautiful perfection of things. It's a feeling of zen and I find myself just wishing that humans would all get on board and return to this zen. I also find myself slowly returning to my childhood nature. By that I mean my intuition, empathic ability, connection to animals, imagination, confidence, faith, positivity, peace, playfulness, using that which comes from the inside more basically. I no longer ever feel lonely. I just feel totally connected and
alive.
I do have the occasional negative slip where I find myself having to deal with things I didn't deal with in the past or when my brain decides to put up a major fight for control. I also have been having panic attacks where I would begin to fear that I am no longer connected to the Divine. It usually occurs when my brain takes over and I am brought back into the old way of things (which can no longer function.
). But this has been occurring less and less as I stop trying to make sense of it and place it in a box. I'm just more accepting of the way my life is moving and I place my faith in God to carry me to where I need to be.