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Shamou · 06-22-2007, 03:53 AM

A man went to apply for a job. After filling out all of his applications, he waited anxiously for the outcome. The employer read all his applications and said, "We have an opening for people like you." "Oh, great," he said, "What is it?" "It's called the door!"

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A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp: "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep wittle wabbits?"

And the shopkeeper gets down on his knees, so that he's on her level, and asks: "Do you want a wittle white wabby or a soft and fuwwy bwack wabby or maybe one like that cute wittle bwown wabby over there?"

The little girl puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice: "I don't fink my pyfon really giveths a thit."

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A man arrives at work covered in scratches and bite marks, his suit torn, his tie all crooked and his face bruised. Seeing the state he's in, a colleague asks, "

What happened? Did you have an accident? No the guy replies. " I just buried my mother-in-law."

But how did you get all those injuries? "

She didn't want to get in the coffin!"

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The Hunting Trip....

A father and son went hunting together for the first time.

The father said: "Stay here and be very QUIET. I'll be across the field."

A few minutes later the father heard a blood Curdling scream and ran back to his son.

"What's wrong?" the father asked. "I told you to be Quiet."

The boy, bless his heart, answered; "Look, I was quiet when the Snake slithered across my feet. I was quiet when the bear breathed down my neck. I didn't move a muscle when the skunk climbed over My shoulder. I closed my eyes and held my breath when the wasp Stung me. I didn't cough when I swallowed the gnat I didn't cuss or scratch when the poison oak started itching. But when the two squirrels crawled up my pant legs and said, "Should we eat them here or take them with us?" ............. Well, I guess I just Panicked................"

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06-22-2007, 03:53 AM	#202 (permalink)
Shamou Banned Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Quebec, Canada Posts: 3,811	A man went to apply for a job. After filling out all of his applications, he waited anxiously for the outcome. The employer read all his applications and said, "We have an opening for people like you." "Oh, great," he said, "What is it?" "It's called the door!" -------------------------------------------------- A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp: "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep wittle wabbits?" And the shopkeeper gets down on his knees, so that he's on her level, and asks: "Do you want a wittle white wabby or a soft and fuwwy bwack wabby or maybe one like that cute wittle bwown wabby over there?" The little girl puts her hands on her knees, leans forward and says in a quiet voice: "I don't fink my pyfon really giveths a thit." --------------------------------------------------- A man arrives at work covered in scratches and bite marks, his suit torn, his tie all crooked and his face bruised. Seeing the state he's in, a colleague asks, " What happened? Did you have an accident? No the guy replies. " I just buried my mother-in-law." But how did you get all those injuries? " She didn't want to get in the coffin!" -------------------------------------------------------- The Hunting Trip.... A father and son went hunting together for the first time. The father said: "Stay here and be very QUIET. I'll be across the field." A few minutes later the father heard a blood Curdling scream and ran back to his son. "What's wrong?" the father asked. "I told you to be Quiet." The boy, bless his heart, answered; "Look, I was quiet when the Snake slithered across my feet. I was quiet when the bear breathed down my neck. I didn't move a muscle when the skunk climbed over My shoulder. I closed my eyes and held my breath when the wasp Stung me. I didn't cough when I swallowed the gnat I didn't cuss or scratch when the poison oak started itching. But when the two squirrels crawled up my pant legs and said, "Should we eat them here or take them with us?" ............. Well, I guess I just Panicked................" .