Quote:
Originally Posted by Jenny  Nice Shamou! Bit behind on my reading but reading that list made it worth the time it takes to catch up!!   |
You mean your boss is overworking you...???
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Dear Friends:
I have the distinguished honor of being on the committee to
raise $5,000,000 for a monument to George W. Bush.
We originally wanted to put him on Mt. Rushmore until we
discovered there was not enough room for two more faces. We then
decided to erect a statue of George W. in the Washington, DC, Hall
Of Fame. We were in a quandary as to where the statue should be
placed. It was not proper to place it beside the statue of George
Washington, who never told a lie, or beside Richard Nixon, who
never told the truth, since George could never tell the difference.
We finally decided to place it beside Christopher Columbus,
the greatest Republican of them all. He left not knowing where he
was going, and when he got there he did not know where he was. He
returned not knowing where he had been, decimated the well being of
the majority of the population while he was there, and did it all
on someone else's money.
Thank you,
George W. Bush Monument Committee
PS: We have raised $1.35 so far
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Two hillbillies walk into a restaurant. After ordering their cornbread and beans, they talk about the latest addition to their junkyard business.
Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress.
One of the hillbillies looks at her and says "Kin ya swallar?" The woman shakes her head no. "Kin ya breathe?" The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.
The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue.
The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the
hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar.
His friend says, "Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick Maneuver', but I ain't never seed nobody do it."
.