A man had lost one of his arms. One day he had had it. He decided to commit suicide. He got on an elevator and went to the top of a building to jump off. He was standing on the ledge looking down and saw this man skipping along, whistling and kicking up his heels. He looked closer and saw this man didn't have any arms at all.
He started thinking, what am I doing up here feeling sorry for myself, I still have one good arm to do things with. There goes a man with no arms skipping down the sidewalk happy and going on with his life.
He hurried down and caught the man with no arms. He told him how glad he was to see him because he had lost one of his arms and felt ugly and useless and was going to kill himself. He thanked him again for saving his life and he knew he could make it with one arm if that guy could go on with no arms.
The man with no arms began dancing and kicking up his heels again.
He asked, "Why are you so happy anyway?"
He said, "I'm NOT happy. My a$$ itches."
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The old gent was backing his Rolls into the last available parking space when a zippy red sports car whipped in behind him to take the spot.
The young driver jumped out and said: "Sorry Pops, but you've got to be young and smart to do that."
The old man ignored the remark and kept reversing until the Rolls had crunched the sports car into a crumpled heap.
"Sorry son, you've got to be old and rich to do that!"
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