I quit. I'd been doing it for a long time, but lately things have been coming together that made me realize that it's not beneficial to me.
I pirated everything. Everything. Paraliminals, Self-help ebooks, music, PPV events, movies, PUA material, TV shows, and... um... "adult" material.
It's not that I think it's really cool to get stuff for free instead of pay for it, that I'm really putting one over on the man. I'd never given a second thought to the fact that it could possibly be my own insecurities playing themselves out in the real world.
When I pirated the new Pirates movie (no pun intended), I realized, "I didn't even want to watch this! Why did I even get it?!". That got the wheels spinning. Then I saw this
, which I must have. But that's not something you can pirate. That got me thinking: what makes it different from any of the other stuff I get, the stuff I download, and was hard pressed to find an answer. Then I read Steve's article, and even if things don't make complete sense yet, it no longer makes sense to continue downloading.
At the same time, I've recently sank into debt. All that saving on media really hasn't saved me at all. So last night, I made some changes. I started out, thinking I'd only get rid of some songs, put a moratorium on downloading, maybe a one month trial of sorts. I deleted song after song after song, one by one. Then I just kept going. I deleted my p2p program, my bitTorrent program... until I was left only with the 9 songs I bought from iTunes.
What now? I don't know. In doing this, I am hoping I also will change as a person. Be more willing to give, to create... instead of take, and hide things. I laughed to myself yesterday, as I realized that even on the p2p and bitTorrent, I would download, and fix my settings such as that I never shared at all.
There are loopholes for me to think about... CDs I've already burned copies of, what I consider "fair": if I borrow a CD from the library, if I think it's fine to rip songs to my computer or not.
In the meantime, it's time to dust off the old CDs, DVDs... perhaps put a dent into that copy of "Atlas Shrugged" that I got months ago.