A man who was on his deathbed calls a priest and a lawyer. The priest shows up and then the lawyer does too.
Finally the lawyer asks "I don't know you, why did you call me?"
Then the priest says "I've never seen you in church either, why did you ask me.?"
The old man replies that they are there to listen to his final words. Feeling sorry for the old man, who probably doesn't have anyone else, they grant his request.
Finally after a long while they hear him speak,
"Dear God, thank you for granting my last wish - to die as our Lord Jesus did, between a thief on one side and a pervert on the other...."
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