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Originally Posted by Aikay  This problem is not really directly mine, but its just that the believe, “a friend’s burden is indirectly yours” is very much part of me. |
Aikay, I can tell you are a well-intentioned, kind-hearted person. I used to have a very similar attitude towards others, but would almost always come away frustrated time and time again due to their unwillingness to change for the better. Over time, I learned that I can never force anyone to change, even if I believed that my recommendation was truly the solution to their problems. As this realization grabbed hold, my focus shifted from problem-solving to empathy and/or encouragement, resulting in an improved interpersonal communication experience.
The book that helped me solidify this approach was 'Codependent No More'. It can be shipped to you for only a few dollars, but the wisdom contained within the book is priceless.
Amazon.com: Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself: Books: Melody Beattie
Best wishes
Tom