Like I said, it's always easier to speculate about what I 'would have' done in that situation.
To me though, as a bystander I probably would have stepped in and made a loud noise to get their attention like "Öi" (aussie terminology)...and made eye contact with the ones doing the majority of the bullying whilst saying (what's going on here...why are you being this way to someone who isn't bothering you at all but minding their own business, don't you have anything better to do?" (I've done this before btw, with a boy who was getting hassled by some african boys at the library one day...the librarians just pretended it wasn't happening, like everyone else, and didn't step in!
I don't think I would have said stuff like what you suggested as that would only cause them to laugh and turn the focus of their attention onto me. Instead I would be saying something like "this is my club, and bullying isn't tolerated here, so I would like it if you leave if this is the way you are gonna behave"...and maintain eye contact with an authoritative voice that means business. I would not be gentle about it, but I also would not be too aggressive...just definite in my request for them to leave if they aren't gonna stop it!
I know it sounds easy me saying it, but if you have the right attitude in your voice and lay down the law of how it's gonna be in YOUR club, then they will listen (hopefully). If not...call the friggin' police on them for aggravated assault!
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Originally Posted by Lauxa  How would you have asserted yourself? It's pretty hard to do in a 4-on-1 situation. I remember now there was another enormous guy there. I really think the big guys would have reacted if the situation had gotten really violent, although they would not intercede in such a petty conflict. How would you have reacted as a bystander?
Many of you seem to think he should have just left the situation. At what point should he have left? What words and demeanor do you imagine him having? Is that taking the easy way out?
Maybe I could have said something like "Wimp is a precious and valued human being. When you hurt wimp, I feel disturbed because _____." Well, I read that 3-part pattern is good for fostering dialog, don't know exactly why I feel disturbed though. Because I have some shred of empathy probably. Not for the bullies though, hah! |