Perhaps there is a perfectly rational explanation for your dream, DCaldwell. In psychological terms, such dreams are not unusual, the subconcious addressing issues the conscious mind has noticed. The logical, practical nature of your dreams would suggest this is the case.
Is it possible that your dreams are sensible considerations of practical issues? Despite having a positive attitude to death and loss of a loved one, it seems there are aspects you want clarifying, such as whether or not to contact your mother-in-law. Your wife's alarming symptoms may have prompted your mind to address how to proceed in the event of either of your deaths. Just a thought, but it may be a simple matter of discussing what each of you needs in the event of the other's demise.
As to your wife's problems, there could be practical issues to consider. In the UK, there has been a rise in new, strange illnesses which doctors have been unable to explain or treat. Some doctors actually go into denial and accuse the patient of imagining things. The fact that all tests have proven normal could be a result of doctors not recognising an illness. Specialist help and more investigation into the problem might be a good idea. It could be something very minor and treatable. The pain in the leg sounds very like a trapped nerve; pregnancy certainly puts a strain on the knees and ankles, what is the chance the pains are an after effect? The chest pains could be stress or breathing related. I had similar problems when I was twenty-eight, but my heart was strong and healthy. In the end, it was a matter of deep breathing exercises and stress relief. Of course, your wife's situation is entirely different and I don't pretend to have the answer.
I hope this is of some help to your situation. Peace to you both.
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