 Thank you Akagi
Hello Akagi, i would like to thank you and to tell you that you got it EXACTLy on its HEAD. What you said is absolutely correct and its something of a realization i've come to myself.
When my counselor left, i identified his leaving (an external event) as something that meant something about me, sorta like your example about getting another hit, I thought of my counselor as the drug dealer who gave me my drug. When in reality, this is not so. The difficulty lies in my thoughts, i feel as if i am submerged under a BLANKET, a DELUGE of limiting beliefs, very threatening thoughts that sort of Safeguards my ego and protects it. To uproot these thoughts SEEMS daunting and my safety FEELS threatened if i let these beliefs go. Now personally i believe many of these feelings and beliefs are just that, manufactured things I've decided are true. The fear comes from NOT knowing the other side, To use an analogy, its like i see the river and the landmass across the river, but i only see a few feet inland, and its the fear of not knowing what lies beyond and knowing that you have to MOVE your whole life across this river and set up camp in another place that is scary.
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