whilst I appreciate at least some of the responses I'm getting here - perhaps I am too stupid to hear what others are saying - I wonder if anyone responding actually knows what I am talking about. I don't really get the feeling that you know what it is like to have a mother who is so wrapped up in herself and bullying her husband into being present, that she is not there for her children.
I just last night recalled a story that my mum told me and my dad last month about how (in that non-judgemental email about childhood pain) I had said that I had felt that no one was around to help with homework. She replied "oh, yes, your father was too there sometimes. I remember it was the biggest row we had. I wanted a 'cuddle' and he stayed up to help you with your homework. How we rowed!" That struck me as just embarassing last month. Now thinking about it, I realise that she was telling me how she was competing with my dad's affections.
I wonder if it's a certain type of person who posts on this forum who DOESN'T have similar issues to mine or whether what I've written actually chimes with anyone.
I didn't write this post in absolute ignorance of the pros and cons or subjective viewpoints; but I defy anyone to be 'non-judgemental' about an upbringing that they are still sorting out in their head or 'let go' of a parent who treats you like you are some elderly maiden aunt on a trip for tea. We are able (in anonymous cyberspace) to have this kind of open conversation. Why do you consider me judgemental for wanting to get at least a little bit of open book action with my mother?
Or am I being collosally stupid?
Thanks
Michael  |