Hi Yang Li!
One of the things that jumps out at me in your situation is that you don't give yourself enough credit for the positive transformation that first took place.
You think it was the therapist or something outside yourself that was responsible. The only thing the therapist did was set you on the right path by thinking positively about yourself and your surroundings.
Your "seeds of doubt" started to get the better of you until you no longer believed in yourself without Dr. Paul there to prop you up. The truth is you are capable of getting back on track.
Start reading positive books that help you understand yourself better and what you are capable of. You sound like a very intelligent person who just needs to start believing in yourself. Your parent did not encourage you to develop self-confidence so you are going to have to do it on your own.
It is so possible and you can do it. Reading and participating in these forums will help. Good luck!
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