ive been pondering in somethin...as it has to do with IM i think this is the right place to share.
Ok so ive been reading the BL book and im on page 151 still.
In this precise moment in my life,i started reading Bl and it is the perfect time for doing so.
im not doing the process to have more money or to turn my life to better..not in a conscious way- im doing so in order to know the Truth and to live by it- i really am starting to see the magic that there IS and i want to lay with it.
to have fun and live life with a childlike feeling and behaviour ( you know what i mean).
moments ago a thought came to my Mind: this is all an Illusion and in that order,so the debts i have in my name ARE.
tHOSE DEBTS are in my name although it wasnt my persona who made it ( was my FATHER through a busines he had where i put my name on it).for years ive been solifying anger,regrets,doubts,all sort of not that positive things within me,just cause i felt angry at the world.by with only 27 years old having a huge ammount of "weight" in my shoulders.
i started withrawing and unconsciously i held strong bad feelings torwards my fATHER that didnt do the best thing for Me.
BUT!
a thought came to My mind: i signed the papers in 2005,when i was still studying at College.i was almost graduating and my Father told me that it was a temporary thing,that my name was there for a short period of time and that when i finished school i could get out my name to put him.
Hppened that i finished in 2006 and still my name coundlt be retired because my father was still in that period of time,that he was forbidden to have business in his name.along with My Mother.there was no one more to hae the name there,but only Me.
Times passed,and only he closed the business last year,already with huge debts.
According to the BL - i created all this unconsciously-and only today i saw the WHY.
the course i was having was not the one of my true excitement.I was studying only to have a degree,i never sincerely wanted to work in that field.It wasnt my Passion and i didnt wanted to be another unhappy person working from 9- to 18pm in something that didnt enjoyed.
So....when i finished the course,my country was already in Crisis,and i could do interns payd by the State cause im in debt with Social Security and Finances.I was not able to sign in in the Employment CENTER cause i did an illegal thing by giving my name to a business where i was never in.
Unconsciously,i created the debt in order not to work in what i studied for.
Suddently that is the conclusion i get! it makses lots of sense now.and im really really surprised to see this.