Originally Posted by cylon  I think ego/personality loves to call shots. There is an emotional rush you get from it. It feels great. And I think there's definitely a place for it.
But I think that place is in short bursts in order to push past self-limitiations and comfort zones, and once you push through, it's better to step back again.
You can't sustain the self-focused determination, "I'M IN CHARGE HERE, BUDDY!" mode for too long because that is exhausting over time. And why is it exhausting? Because it's trying to make it appear that your creations, and your decision to create, and the means of your creation, are all separate when in fact it's all just one big "it".
There is a huge source/flow of creation and positive feelings and beauty, all flowing THROUGH you, yet when you say "It's me! I did this! I did that!" it's like putting a tight grip around that flow of energy and cutting it off. Once you separate yourself from it, you've declared that it doesn't exist on its own. And it stops "working".
But ego and wanting to be in charge isn't likely to go away (and I don't see why it should) so there has to be a way to find balance between the two states.
Maybe when you find a specific desire, you declare you are calling the flippin shots and decree it upon your kingdom. You are the ultimate authority so dammit, when you say something, people listen, and it's done. That's how obedient they are.
But after decreeing it you must step back and trust that your kingdom is never going to let you down, not because it's afraid of your wrath, but because its only joy is to give you everything you want, ANYWAY.
The other side to declaring "I call the shots!" is expecting that your shot calling was heard and things are taken care of.
Otherwise, if you don't trust your kingdom to obey, what was the point of getting so worked up in the first place? You demanded an audience with the universe, and it listened. In order for you to do your job you have to let the universe do its job. Those jobs are not mutually exclusive.
And if you trust that, you can go back to relaxing, and just letting things unfold. If the doubt or powerlessness comes up again, declare you are calling the shots, realize you have the best universal staff in the universe, and again, relax and let things unfold.
As far as I can tell this is the only way to let the ego's need to be heard and the real truth of how things happen, work together. |