Personal Development for Smart People Forums - View Single Post

Sunnybayes · 05-04-2007, 05:42 AM

Well for criticism I usually just say "I completely agree with you!!!" so I completely avoid the me vs them frame of mind.

And if its constructive criticisms then I tell them thanks. I guess I never take anything personal.

I realize they are not attacking me... just some subconcious pattern of my behavior that I can change.

Or that perhaps they have just not seen the whole picture on why I did my actions.

And also that I take good care to see things from their point of view, acknowledge that I understand them, and then I let them see things from my point of view. Then I tell them in some way or another how I will work in elements of both points of view to do something better.

Now as for rejection, again, I don't take it personally. I just consider that if I were in their shoes that I would have done the same thing if I were in their circumstances. And then I backward rationalize to myself why it was good that I was rejected... that I can either do it on my own better and that its their loss that they did not choose me.... like if I'm rejected by a girl then I just tell myself that there are other opportunities, and that I just need to work better on communicating my attractive side better... and its her loss for not choosing me...maybe I'm just delusional.

But with criticism or rejection, just take the rule that there is no such thing as failure, just learning opportunities and feedback.

05-04-2007, 05:42 AM	#2 (permalink)
Sunnybayes Senior Member Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 322	Well for criticism I usually just say "I completely agree with you!!!" so I completely avoid the me vs them frame of mind. And if its constructive criticisms then I tell them thanks. I guess I never take anything personal. I realize they are not attacking me... just some subconcious pattern of my behavior that I can change. Or that perhaps they have just not seen the whole picture on why I did my actions. And also that I take good care to see things from their point of view, acknowledge that I understand them, and then I let them see things from my point of view. Then I tell them in some way or another how I will work in elements of both points of view to do something better. Now as for rejection, again, I don't take it personally. I just consider that if I were in their shoes that I would have done the same thing if I were in their circumstances. And then I backward rationalize to myself why it was good that I was rejected... that I can either do it on my own better and that its their loss that they did not choose me.... like if I'm rejected by a girl then I just tell myself that there are other opportunities, and that I just need to work better on communicating my attractive side better... and its her loss for not choosing me...maybe I'm just delusional. But with criticism or rejection, just take the rule that there is no such thing as failure, just learning opportunities and feedback.