Quote:
Originally Posted by Lindsoid  Since when is it unhealthy to feel pain at the loss of a loved one? The pain does come from attachment to things that are temporary but why is that bad? Why would one value no pain over pain? Development isn't a way to transcend pain, on the contrary with development comes a greater and greater capacity for pain, a greater awareness of suffering and the realization that it is attachment by the ego... which is healthy. This is why you seem dissociated. |
Whether pain (or anything else) is good or bad is a personal assessment (judgment) unique to the person experiencing it. In the case of pain, lots of people agree that it's not pleasurable. That is not to say this is the right or correct way to perceive pain, or that there is a right or correct way to perceive it. However, for those of us who do not experience benefit or joy in the face of pain, it seems like something to avoid.
In fact, isn't that how we, as human beings, or even as living things at all, are hardwired? To avoid pain? Isn't that what pain is for? To use as a message that something is harming us and therefore to avoid?
Obviously, that's a whole nother ball of string.
My point is that it's not inherently bad to experience pain, and if you want to experience it, you have every right and ability to do so to your heart's content. And, in the case of death, my desire would be to feel neither pain nor "nothing" (disconnect) in its face.
I want to feel
joy in the face of death. Wouldn't it be awesome to have a natural reaction of elation and excitement when someone dies? To get there, I think I'd need to know (not think;
know) the following things:
1. The person was gloriously happy in their new surroundings.
2. That I would once again be with them.
3. That I could (two-way) contact them freely until I reached #2.
Honestly, I'm not there at this point. I suspect those three things, but I do not know them.