Great post RT Wolf,
I struggled with the same thing for a while, and couldn't reconsile the paradox, until I realized there was no paradox. Like so many spiritual truths, the two sides - became one.
I totally agree with your conclusions, but would like to add one thing. It's basically the same, but a slightly different way of looking at it.
I still set my intentions and charge them with emotion, but now, as you suggest, I apply non-attachment to the outcome of that preference. I now use the preference or intention or goal, as a direction only - and focus on the present moment.
When one is fully present in the Now, one is able to draw on a remarkable power that speeds the manifestation of ones intentions. Set your intentions, set 'em high, allow the appropriate emotional charge to flow into them and then get busy in the now. Forget about the outcome, and let those emotions flow into your doing, and not only will your goal be more likely to manifest (that, or something better), it will do so while you are experiencing joy and bliss, in whatever it is you are doing (and that doesn't mean necessarily working on something directly related to that intention).
joyful manifesting to you!
