[Ijin Kaion]

ok as i am typing this i am stoned.

i`m from the netherlands so it is legal here and i am above the permitted age of 18.
so i smoke once every week, or once every 2 weeks, not much.
so i`m not an addict or something.

so when i started drinking beer mostly at the age of 18, started smoking at the age of 19, and started smoking weed at the age of end 19, 2 weeks before my birthday.
i got introduced with it at work where i saw my colleages smoking after a hard night work, and my brother`s girlfriend at that time worked there too.
so my brother smoked weed too but he is older then me.
so learned it with my brother and got familliar with my limmit and how much i needed for the effect to take place.
i need little, and at later points as now i still smoke as often as before, so still not often, i could keep control over myself normally and smoke more.
i have rules for that because i don`t want to end up as a junk or devellop mental disorders from it.

so history states...

when i became familliar with smoking in control and smoke little, i started to notice that because the weed was making my mind step down a notch and i could focus on just my energy alone.
and understand it much better.

so i became familliar with that.

present...

now i sit here stoned, i just went outside in the nice weather in the dark.
i learned tips and tricks for rolling and stuff but i make them go well for myself.
i can feel my energy, my leg is moving up and down to the rythem of asian kung fu generation, uncontrolled, but it feels good.
i discover different ways to handle energy.
different means of creating it.
that`s what i did to advance from 22 chackra`s to 44.
just from a sweet little green plant:P

my enthousiasm is also more lively now i notice.
i feel ok because i reach deeper into my source of soothing.
i keep my body warm, i listen to nice music, i remember things from all the things i have done, and that has been nice because i lost all my memmory of my childhood, it`s like a blank that i`m slowly filling in.

so yes i`m ************ed up, i have a mental disorder wich i use rather then let it use me.
gives me more to do when i enrichen my existance.
i just spent listening a song and go up in it and i love it.
i`m swinging behind my keyboard^_^


but you know i write this now and it`s not like i lose my memmory of what i did.
my point to this is that my energy is also a lot more stronger when i`m stoned.

i also have these energy trips sometimes.
my senses can go haywire with it, but in a controlled manner.
sometimes it feels like my skin is on fire and it is buzzing and little drops of cool water are dropped on my skin at a fast rate.
it doesn`t hurt or anything it is just interresting:P [@.@weeee]
i have recieved a lot of ideas for illusion techniques through that.
it surely had a lot of effect on my inspiration within me.
who could have thought, all thanks to a sweet little green plant:P
but all in a controlled way.

i wear gloves because i have a high amount of energy that circulates freely and i was leaking constantly, giving people headaches or making them faint in my presence, the time of no control basically.
but with the techniques i did devellop i bought a pair of black socks, cut them to shape and then sealed several blocking techniques, that utillize some of the overflow of energy, in the fabric and structure of the gloves, so they recycle my energy send it to knowledge i`m researching on the ethereal plain, so they get done.

it`s a long process but worth the effort because now i can walk around without gloves, although i like to wear them as the pressure on my hands it gives is pleasant.
i learned to control the leaking on my own during the times i wear my gloves.
they are fingerless so they don`t give any dexterity problems.

damn i`m stoned...

i like to read this over with a mind not under influence tomorrow.
i`ll keep posting stuff if i see something, or remember something good.

feel free to comment this or ask questions i`ll gladly answer them^_^

abayo^_^