| | Procrastination
Well its day three in hospital and its going well. I have surrendered the process. I am doing everything I am told do and ignoring my Ed. Normally, its been quite a struggle at each step, liking buttering the bread and things like that although this time, its easy. Its not my choice, its the dieticians. I have assigned authority to her and I am choosing to comply.
Interestingly, in a group discussion with the psychiatrist, he talked about procrastination. He raised the idea of procrastinating procrastination. So rather than procrastinating, simply do. We did various exersizes polarising action from procrastination. When I procrastinated, I felt anxious and miserable. The room was silent and no one was happy. When we did action and released control to a partner and did anything they said for five minutes, there was so much laughter, I was happy, I was having fun. I learnt I prefer to do, than to wait.
Procrastination is to hold on to your fears. To wait and not know. Its to miss out. To take action you may fail or succeed but either way you will feel good. You will have tried. And that is a wonderful feeling.
"Sometimes the beauty is in the Attempt." One Tree Hill
Commitment, is long term goals and short term action. Thats what I'm learning. If I want recovery, then every second of the day, I have to recommit to that goal, to affirm recovery in my mind. Everytime I do that, I ge t closer to doing it automatically.