Quote:
Originally Posted by Oldsoul  My fear would be that I go ahead and check myself out of the marriage, when things could be better down the road. I don't know, I guess my wife is right when she says that it's my problem, because it looks like I'm going to have to make the decision one way or the other. |
OldSoul,
Please remember that you can't stay in a relationship based on the premise that it might get better in the future. If you've really tried and things aren't changing then make a decision to be happy.
I say this only based on my personal experience. If things are not good and don't seem to be getting better, how long is it ok to be unhappy and hope that things improve? It's kind of a trick question, because the answer is that you should not have to be in a situation where you feel unhappy, undervalued, un-accepted.
A lot of people have given you some good advice. My only two cents is: set a time limit. If you are going to give it a go then set a specific time when you'll sit down and evaluate whether things have changed or not. You're going to have to be brutally honest with yourself when you do this. If things are exactly as they are now then make a commitment to take action.
If things are improving then that's great and you can set another time to sit down and review it. You might have to do this a couple of times, but if the process works and things keep getting better then you know you have a good chance at making it.
No-one should have to feel unhappy and lost in a relationship.
Seraph.