[siamesesilk]

Hi Oldsoul,

I am sorry that you are having to go through this alone. By that, I mean your wife can't even explain to you in words why she doesn't want to have sex with you. She just expects you to accept her vague reasons and to be "content" with that. How is that possible? Sex is one of the essential things that binds a marriage. The more the better in my opinion.

.....she just says that she doesn't want to have sex. That is her reason, and she thinks that I should just respect her, and take care of my needs on my own. I've explained to her that masturbation is not going to take care of my needs, and she just replies, "well that's your problem, then."

This is hurtful. She needs to explain why this is true. This is very much her problem as well. She needs to hear that.

She is really being quite mean about it, actually, but our financial situation right now, and the fact that we have two kids makes things really difficult to just part ways.

There is no reason to have someone be mean to you. I think denying sex for a year is being mean! I know it would be hard on you and your kids. Yes, you are right in saying that. It will be difficult, without a doubt, but you need happiness, passion and love in your life...and some good sex sooner than later! I would never tell you what to do, you know what you need and want to do.

As for my male friends, well, they are not really helpful, they suggest getting the sex on the side, but that's not really what I'm after.

This is a cowards way of dealing with it. If your true friends have suggested for you to do this then you really need reevaluate them as well.

I really love my wife and want to be faithful, but I need her to show me the affection I need. And to be honest, I really only want to make love to her, and not anyone else.

You are a good man and there is someone (hopefully your wife) who will love you, but you need to start seeking it. I don't mean elsewhere. If you want her love you need to seek it from her. If she isn't willing to talk about it or do it, then you need to decide for yourself, if you are worthy of love. I believe you are worthy of love. You are worthy of love.