Sex is important in a marriage. It allows for physical, emotional, and spiritual connection with your partner. When you are married to someone, you share of yourself to bring fulfilment and joy to the other. It's not fair to refuse yourself to your spouse without just reason since you have entered into a relationship which entails sexual intimacy.
You might want to ask her why exactly she is refusing to be intimate with you. If there is a valid reason (emotional or medical problems, etc.) then I'm sure the case would be different. You said she loves you but doesn't like you. Do you think it may be because of that? I don't understand fully. What does she mean by that? If she loved you, why not seek couseling?
The problem involves both of you, since you are upset over something you are seeking from her but are not receiving. You are indeed in a difficult situation. Have you spoken to any of your male friends about this? What have they suggested?
Honestly, I think you're being quite fair and understanding about this. There is an extent to patience and understanding, though. I hate the "D" word, but you are not in an easy place here. You must consider your needs along with your wife's and your childrens'.
I'm sorry that you're going through this. I hope things improve between you and your wife.
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