Quote:
Originally Posted by Theo77 
I think my basic hang up though is that polarizing with love seems to imply giving up personal power and yeilding control. I leke directing my own actions rather than feeling like I am being directed by others.
So I hold out hope that there is a way to weild personal power with out being either dispicably evil, nor...You know, everyones servant.
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That makes a lot of sense. I have similar issues.
For me the key is that by giving up control, you aren't
really giving up control. I used to think that by serving others I'm making myself a slave to them. It's an orange chakra issue - fear of being possessed. Slowly I figured out that I can serve people on my terms without worrying about outcomes and stuff like that. I am free without doing anything - freedom is a natural thing. And if I freely choose to serve, who can say I'm a slave?
Likewise on the other side I've had lots of fear of others infringing on my space. Fear of people harming me, fear of being vulnerable. Eventually I realised that this fear is baseless because I'm protected. Nothing can happen to me unless I allow it to - that fact is provided by the creator. Only my own willful ignorance can harm me, and if I turn my attention to the creator the ignorance melts away. That is the natural state of being.
The solution to Fear is Faith. Faith in yourself, faith in the universe, faith in others. Faith that you are provided for.
I fear harming others, this is a more recent fear than the other ones. As my compassion grows the worst thing that could happen to me is causing harm to someone. To solve this fear I refind my faith in the universe, faith that my path is right, faith in my own abilities that i've cultivated. The fear of hurting someone can be just as terrifying as the fear of being hurt.
I used to walk through life planning every step. I sought to illuminate the path so that I could walk it - I wanted to predict everything before it happened. This was a form of fear for me. Eventually I realised to step onto the path without any light except my own faith in divinity and faith that all is as it should be. The only light that's needed is the light of the creator. His lantern is never turned off, though we sometimes shut our eyes.
Old habits die hard but I'm making progress
