Originally Posted by rei
I am actually quite sensitive to big changes, even having family over for a week eventually led to me being snarky which is not how I usually am. It was a side effect of my sensory system getting rubbed raw by all the extra noise. So yes, I actually do much better when my environment is supportive, and I feel totally fine wanting that. And since I am fairly sensitive to minor shifts, big shifts are harder for me to adjust to. I would not say this is out of alignment with myself since my general intention is to also create a sense of support for others. It's just applying that for myself.
I know what you're talking about. My relatives can drive me up the wall and have me being snappy and sarcastic if I spend too much time with them, lovely though they are. The difference is that I don't see this as a good thing that should be maintained and worked around throughout my life.
I don't want my life to be bent around avoiding people or situations that make me irritable. I recognize this as a dysfunction in myself, not in my environment. I'm not being made irritable, I'm becoming irritable, by my own will and my own power. It is not an inescapable aspect of my personality, but rather something that can erased and lived without.
I'm not aware that it could possibly be different for you, not when our reactions are so similar. It is not your environment or your sensitivity that is making you snarky. It is you that is making yourself snarky, and it is of little benefit to you to develop avoidance behaviors to account for your snark when it would be better to simply live without it.
Perhaps it would still be true that your sensitivity would make noisy family situations unpleasant, but that unpleasantness would be much less unpleasant if it weren't followed by a lot of snarking. Your physical reaction could be unavoidable, but your emotional reaction is not. Edit:
I wasn't satisfied with the way I wrote my response, so I rewrote it in an effort to be less confrontational, lest we cross swords again and accomplish nothing.
My relatives drive me up the wall too, sometimes. But you're not controlled by your relatives, or by your sensitivity for that matter. Your snarkiness is your own to start and to stop, irrespective of your environment or its goings-ons. You don't have to become less sensitive, but you do have to take some responsibility for your snarkiness rather than warp your environment around avoiding it.
Your physical reaction to the noise of your family (and the noise itself) may be outside your control, but the emotional reaction you have is not. Emotions are not passive sensations like vision or touch. They are active manifestations, created by you. When your hand is in a fire, feeling heat is inevitable. When you are exposed to your family, being snarky is not.