View Single Post
Old 04-26-2010, 04:16 AM   #13 (permalink)
The Cloud
Family Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,203
The Cloud is just really niceThe Cloud is just really niceThe Cloud is just really niceThe Cloud is just really niceThe Cloud is just really nice
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by rei View Post
I was interested in communicating my state of being ('I am adjusting and would appreciate it if the environment was supporting me better').
Is that really what you wanted to say, though? Just going off my own experience, I know that whenever I arbitrarily say something like "I know I'm in the wrong state of mind, but I just need you to deal with me while I adjust," I feel all wrong inside. It feels like I'm asking somebody to support my emotional dysfunction. It feels way out of alignment with myself, and appropriately I never get the feeling that I'm getting what I want when I ask that question. Also, once I ask that question I commit myself more to the state of mind that I'm trying to get out of, and my intuition and ability to interact with people goes out the window.

Perhaps that's the problem you're having, is that you're asking for something that's out of alignment with yourself, and that's why you're not getting what you're asking for. I'm not saying it's wrong to ask for a more supportive environment, but if you're like me then the question is doing you harm, and trying to compensate for it with a concrete intellectual method won't address the underlying self-evasion.

That's the feeling I get, based on my experience, is that you feel like you deserve the thing you're asking for, but you really don't want it. Kind of like "why do I have to be so different, that I can't have the normal dysfunctional things that everybody else gets? Why can't somebody come along that can't be affected by my bad mood?" But you can't expect people to be unaffected by your bad mood when you yourself aren't unaffected. Perhaps a few people are lucky enough to have such acquaintances, but most of us have to live up to the best in ourselves without such inspirational company.

Then again, maybe I'm just projecting my own experiences where they don't belong.
The Cloud is offline   Reply With Quote