[themaster]

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

That would only make things worse, I can't relax when I'm talking to people, especially on the phone since I have a phobia about that. Anytime somebody is around me I can't fully relax and anytime I'm on the phone I have to pace the floor. I actually have a path, I walk through the kitchen, into the livingroom, go around through the kitchen again, in circles, until I'm off the phone. I dont know why, it's just this nervous thing I do because I hate talking on the phone and if I try to sit still I'll start to feel agitated like I need to burn off some energy (probably stress from being nervous). Want to hear something really wierd but is probably too much information for some people? (I am about to get a little gross here) I physically can't go to the bathroom (#2) unless I'm alone. If I live with someone, I can't do it until they leave or go to bed. I can't do it when i'm on vacation, at other people's houses, it just doesn't happen. One time I went to CA for 7 days, I couldn't go the entire time, until I got home, because I was with my friend the whole time. I also could hardly sleep. I only sleep about 1 hour anytime I'm staying in a hotel with somebody or sleeping at someone's house. Sorry I got a little long winded there but I just had to explain my strange inability to relax anytime I'm around someone or talking on the phone to them!

I understand what you're talking about.. maybe it's time to experiment and see if you can change those patterns..

"Unique Challenges" like that can't be good long term.. (even if you've been having them long term..) if you want to experiment with a phone call.. I'm game.. we can just leave the line open (have a speakerphone?) say nothing.. and do our respective things till your ready to try something..

I hope it's not going to be that way at your parents house.. if that's where your going to end up in a few months

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

This is interesting you mention shifting realities just like that, because I actually thought of doing this to see if it would work; Writing a story of my perfect life, from beginning to end, like a novel, and then see if my current life starts shifting to that life. I got the idea actually from my favorite show, Lost, right now there are 2 realities and they are starting to merge together, and I thought hey that could be a fun way to create my new life, just pretend I'm on the show and I have a whole different reality and it's about to merge with the current one!

Yep, this actually works according to bashar.. I can give you his method for this if you want it's simple.. but given how hard it is for you to get everything else to work.. giving you another method you won't use/nor practice may be a waste of time

I'm also planning on giving "lost" a watch again.. when it's over.. (see if it can hold my interest)

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

Really?! I was never like that After my dad would yell at me, I'd be afraid to go near him for the rest of the day and I slowly started to want to be around him less and less. I've noticed the same behavior in my nephew, he's 4, and my brother/his dad is really strict with him and is always yelling at him, and the poor kid doesn't ever talk to him and when its time to go home, he cries and resists as much as he can. I think my brother is raising him the same way we were raised, always yelling at us about what to do, when to do it and how to do it. That is so not good for a kid!

Well, I didn't say it was every kid.. I'm careful with my words if you don't notice

Originally Posted by Rockchick26

But everyone has flaws, you can't deny that. Humans are not perfect or we would have heaven on Earth right now. I think it's a great sign of strength to be able to admit your flaws.

No, actually were perfect! Period! We are perfect!

Now, that might seem odd from your perspective.. but I assure you it's true.. we are a perfect act of creation and of ourselves.. sure there's room for improvement but we are perfect the way we are now..

We don't miss-create anything in existence.. it all has purpose, merit and huge hints of love in it.. we created the ideas of disconnection and in your case getting so swamped up with everything else you lose focus..

Heaven is already here on earth.. you just have to open your eyes.. stop being a afraid.. and recognize heaven!

Stop letting your EGO shout limitations at you.. "no, I can't be happy" "No, I can't go outside" "No, I can't go to the bathroom.. I hate people!"

There are no flaws rockchick.. even though you have many "unique challenges" you are still a perfect being having a perfect existence.. creation is not a random act.. we didn't design wiper blades, rotary phones, algae for *no reason* everything has a purpose to it.. your not different..

All I've ever tried to say to you rockchick.. is wouldn't life be great if you were a little happier?

And that's what all this text from is about.. you being happy.. you not having to be afraid to go the bathroom with strangers.. you getting out there and exploring the world even if you hide in your hotel room and chat with strangers/play games

You wanna know what I think?

(and this may not be the truth)

I think your in fear mode.. you've been there for a while.. and I think your letting your EGO run the show for you.. and because the EGO doesn't know how to be happy! (it just doesn't.. it's not in it's programming.. safe is in it's programming.. HAPPY is not)

Your stuck.. and so the best you can do is bide your time for the point where you will create your "magic key" (pill is the word you used) and unlock yourself.. but I think to unlock yourself is going to require more steps then your willing to take.. so it's like you dash out (dart around like a ninja) your about to grab that "key" to unlock yourself.. then you hear a noise someone is coming.. you dart back into the bushes.. and you do this day in day out.. doesn't matter if it's "abraham" "bashar" "alg" or whoever..

Your going to run to the bushes like a scarred animal every time because you love your misery! Or at least your EGO does.. it just won't take a chance of releasing you from your own chains..

This is just food for thought.. I could be wrong.. and I don't pretend to be right!

Originally Posted by Acting Like Godot

You don't need the LOA.

I do and don't agree with you.. I think rockchick needs a empowering experience that she can re-create again and again to show she's the creator of her reality.. that doesn't necessarily require the LOA.. but the loa would be a bonus..