Thank you for that advice Godot. I like it. I am going to try and integrate that idea into my thinking. Lately, everytime I think about getting well it just feels overwhelming and anxiety provoking. But I think if I slow down a little and take it slower I might be more successful.
I have been struggling this week with the eating disorder. I just feel really agitated and frustrated about the whole thing. I feel enormous grief and sadness when I think about Ed and what I used to be like. I think I have to work through the mixed feelings. I don't want to be sick anymore but somehow it feels like what would I do if I wasn't sick?
I think I have developed an identity as the sick one or the bulimic one. So I'm trying to create a new identity or rediscover myself without the ed. Its hard but im getting there.