Quote:
Originally Posted by soccer7  The truth is i'm a coward, i've never been in a fight before, well only back at primary school, but that's more like getting comboed and KOed then fighting. So i have the fear of violence, and attempt to avoid it at all cost, this makes me unable to tell people off even though i want to real bad.
So all in all i have to find a way to be firm and straight out tell him to leave me alone, i don't want him to think i'm weak, that's another reason why i had the idea to shout at him and get aggressive. |
I personally don't believe that not fighting is a sign of a coward. More like common sense to protect ones self. Then again, as I said before...I am a woman and generally, we don't look at disagreements with an option to go into physical combat.
When I was growing up with two big brothers who could really yell and seem fierce, I would cope by being "sickeningly nice". A female survival tactic I suppose. Anyway, I've worked hard on this lesson. I've found if I do nothing...it causes me great inner turmoil as the lesson continues to repeat and escalate until at some point, I finally deliver my truth. And I don't have to say it all mean and ugly, but it definitely comes across as firm. Like some deep inner place just lays down the law. Recently it sounded like "don't touch me, I don't like it!" It came from my core, and that place that knows my truth.
The reason I quoted you above, soccer 7, is because I feel that if you believe as you say that you are "a coward" then your actions will be in line with your belief. So maybe you can look within and see the wisdom in this thing you call coward and make peace with it? Then...you may be much more likely to stand up for yourself, with firmness and grace, because you respect yourself.
It all comes from within...
Pam