I see. So it could be the being wanted my energy so to speak. And as far as me doing something to someone, I am not innocent by far, but I was working toward light and positivity at that moment. Which was the opposite of what had begun to show in the people I was around. I don't want to blame them because that's just giving them power over me. I would like to think it was my fear of what they were getting into and how I knew I could not go there. As far as power, it is not something I seek now. I have learned and seen how it can corrupt when used for self. That was only in the beginning of my journey and it was not the correct reason for my actions and decisions at the time.
Although, I get the sense that you are sensing something deep within me that may still want power to some degree. Which has made me start to re-think my motives at this point. What I am really seeking at this point is a complete cleansing of the negatives I have picked up on my journey. Because I know they hold me back from my purpose. I'm a newbie with looking at things from this view. I have learned a lot but so glad you are pointing me towards learning it from another direction.