Originally Posted by RedneckGyrl
Does anyone out there understand and relate to what I am feeling? Has anyone ever gone through resenting their "gift" and come out learning how to not allow it to overwhelm yourself and actually enjoy and fully appreciate it? It's like I said, most of the time I love me and what I am, but it's only when going through psychic events, that I start feeling like a friggin freakazoid and I know I need to work on this...just don't know how.
Okay, y'all are released to return to whatever it was you were doing before I started my whining and complaining. Deep down inside I am not like this, this is not the real me most of the time....it just creeps up on me ever so often. I want to be TOTALLY free from the present bouts of resentment to live out the rest of my life daily, peacefully enjoying my gift. I have been telling myself for tons of years, it's only a phase things will get better.
Of course you are angry and resentful at times. After all the unpleasantness you've experienced as a child and as an adult (albeit in different ways) you'd be nuts if you didn't have these bouts of anger and resentfulness. It's good and it's healthy to vent and get all that negitivity out when you feel it. I've got some exercises for you to try that may help you get control over your abilities so they don't control your life and also help you release your anger, frustration, and resentfulness when ever they crop up. Releasing negative emotions
When you feel anger, frustration ect.... rising up in you what you do is write everything down on paper. Write everything you feel. Get everything out until you have nothing more to write. Just keep writing pouring all your anger, frustration, ect... out on to the paper. You can include pictures or bold words by going over them again and again. Nobody is going to read this so don't try to be neat, just get all your feelings out. Use as many sheets of paper as needed. Then when you're all finished --- burn it. As you watch it burn know and feel you are releasing all those emotions. ***
remember to use common sense when burning the paper/s. Burn them inside in a fireplace or outside in a barbecue grill or a metal waste basket ***
If there is no way for you to safely burn them you can bury them in the ground knowing you are releasing your emotions and that they will decompose and be returned to the earth. Or you can write your papers with an ink of some kind that washes out or at least gets so blury that it is unreadable. When finished writing tear the papers up into tiny peices and flush them down the toilet knowing that you're flushing away your emotions. Controling your Psi abilities
Is is very important to control your abilities so you are not at their mercy. You should control them and not allow them to control you. There are two methods I know of that can help. One I call the Aura Method, the other I call the Switch Method. The Aura Method
This method I learned from Jeffery Seelman at STARCLEAR
One thing about auras that many people don't realize is that they are there to help protect us from external unwanted negative energies. By creating a strong protective aura it will act as a buffer for energies, like other people's thoughts and bad moods and other things as well. With practice you can create a very strong protective aura that you command.
First you need to decide on your command words for....
1) Creating a protective aura
2) Making your protective aura stronger
3) Making your protective aura bigger
I like to keep things simple: my commands are "Shields Up!", "Stronger!", and "Bigger!". I use the word shield because it implies protection right from the start. You can command your aura either by saying the commands out loud or just in your head.
Once you have chosen your commands you have to use the same terms always so your aura knows what you want from it. This is another visualization.
1) Visualize yourself.
2) Command your protctive aura to appear and see your protective aura surrounding you. Make your protective aura a color that implies protection to you. I know many people use blue. At this point even though you are surrounded by a protective aura you can see yourself in the middle very clearly.
3) As you're visualizing this say your command for 'Stronger' and see more color in your aura as it becomes thicker. The image of you in the middle now becomes more difficult to see.
4) Now say your command for 'Bigger' and see your protective aura getting bigger.
5) Now visualize some unwanted energy coming at you ( you can see it as a colored shape of some kind or a word) and see it bouncing off your aura or at least getting very weak if it passes through..
Repeat steps 3, 4 and 5 and play around making your protective aura bigger and stronger or bigger, bigger, bigger, stronger, stronger or what ever you want.
6) Now practice this for endurance, how long it lasts. When you first start, your protective aura tends not to last long, but with practice it will last longer. It is easier to practice this when you are out and about. Create your protective aura and maintain an awareness of it and when you feel it getting weaker or smaller just command it to get stronger or bigger. (you can tell how strong your aura is by how much outside energies you feel)
Practice this exercise and it won't take long before you can actually create it and feel a difference in the energies around you. Then you just make it bigger and stronger as you want to. For me when I say "Shields Up! I can feel my protective aura extend out to my wrist and I can feel a difference in the energies around me. If I'm in a store I can mentally say "Shields Up!" and I feel better immediately. I trained my aura to come up strong enough to handle most of the energies I come into contact with. The Switch Method
This is a visualization that worked for me. I was getting overwhelmed by the input of my abilities and came up with this. Like I said it worked for me and I have heard of others that have used it sucessfully as well.
Visualize a wall with a switch on it. Above the swich is a label that reads 'Psi Abilities' in big letters. Next to the switch are smaller labels that read 'ON' and 'OFF'. Right now you should see the switch in the ON position. Now see your hand reaching up and thinking as you do this "I'm turning off my psi abilities now" and then flipping the swich to the 'OFF' position. Or see your hand reaching up and flipping the switch to the 'OFF' position and thinking "My psi abilities are now turned off." To make this work even better as you are visualizing this actually take your hand and move it like you are really flipping the switch. What this will do is ground your visualization in the physical world. Like all exercises this may or may not work the first time you try it. Just keep trying. *** Warning
--- Don't think you can turn off your abilities and just leave them off so you don't have to deal with them. If you do you will suffer the consequences!! Things like not being able to feel happiness and joy, inability to love someone else or feel their love for you. You become like a robot and just go through the motions of life and not able to experience life as it was meant to be experienced. It's horrible. And the longer you have them turned off the more difficult they are to turn back on. ***
You have to set aside sometime everyday or at least every week or 2 - 3 times a week so you can turn your psi abilities back on and work with them. Remember you want to control your abilities not lock them away in a dungeon so you can forget about them.
You can get creative and use a different switch for different abilities. You can also use a slide type of switch so instead of turning them off you can decrease their strength like a dimmer switch for a light bulb. ***
Always remember to make them full strength so you can work with them on a regualr basis.***
I hope this helps somebody out there.