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Originally Posted by Milena  Well this was an adventure to read!
I guess I could add that I've always felt masculine, and for me that means dominant, aggressive and unemotional. But at the same time I experience the exact opposite feelings more rarely but more intensely.
Oh, and interestingly I've always felt more comfortable around men than women. Women make me so nervous... like they're judging me or like they could just snap! Not sure how this developed but it started ever since I can remember. |
i have experience with this too. women didn't really make me nervous, but i felt more natural around guys. in some ways this has changed, or rather, i still feel more natural and 'at home' around guys, but i am much more open to interacting with women... as long as it's not a shopping marathon
and to potentially make it sound even more compex, i don't tend to gravitate toward incredibly/stereotypically masculine men. the guys i end up hanging out with aren't really feminine either, but they aren't usually gungho about football or 'woman's place is in the kitchen' stuff.
maybe i tend to be around other androgynous people, or maybe more conscious people are more fluid regarding gender roles... i am also comfortable around other girls who tend to hang out with mostly guys. some of them are motivated by sexual attention from men, and that doesn't create the same sense of kinship and commonality for me. but many of these girls who are usually more comfortable with guys aren't just hoping for male (sexual) attention. we sometimes joke about how we must be a different species with our own invisible markings because we can tell when we're around another girl who hangs with mostly guys.
i also find girls who naturally end up with more male friends are often described as:
laid back
easygoing
down to earth
(as well as more negative sounding labels, which are not based on a thorough understanding of motivation, temperament and gender).
as for that list of traits, i agree with Andrew it's likely a combination of nature and nurture.