Thread: Blushing
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Old 03-12-2007, 06:25 PM   #10 (permalink)
chunter
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I used to have a horrible problem with blushing when I was in high school and in my early to mid 20's. I bought a book called "The Social Phobia Workbook" I believe it was called. It said this problem can be completely remedied by avoiding caffeine and I found tremendous help with that. Some say too much niacin can cause it as well.
This problem is - like every aspect of conscious reality - "association related." What I mean by that is that every feeling, thought, etc. is tied to another feeling, thought, etc. To end this, you must break the cycle of association. One way to do this is to confront your fear head on. LOOK DIRECTLY INTO THE EYES OF THE PERSON YOU ARE TALKING TO. DO NOT ALLOW YOURSELF to LOOK AWAY. Always remain in control of the situation.
You say "I try but I just can't help it. The more I fear it or think about it the more it happens."
That's true. So you must adopt a sense of humor about it instead of a fear or fatalistic perspective. If you begin to feel the familiar sensations, don't react the way you might usually react; don't look away, don't become shy. If someone comments, say something like, "Yeah, sorry, too much caffeine (or niacin) in my diet. I've gotta give it up" and just carry on. Or, to be even more in control, say something BEFORE you begin to feel an all-out blush coming on, like "I think I've had too much caffeine, is my face all red?" or something like that. Remember to take steps to make yourself feel more confident and in control, such as maintaining dominant eye contact and making only confident/laid-back remarks about it - this will lesson the hold it has on you and put you back in control of your reactions. By altering your conscious reactions, you will also alter your subconscious/physiological responses.
Give up caffeine, break the cycle of associations and in time you will be rid of this problem.
P.S. By giving up caffeine you may actually break the physical response pattern and it may not be necessary to disassociate with anything else - that might be enough to do the trick! Also, don't get dehydrated - this is the cause of MANY problems both physical and mental. 8-11 glasses a day! If you have the patience, do a few "visualizations" and picture yourself, in advance, in any number of situations handling the blushing in a calm and confident manner. Once you're doing it in reality, imagine yourself not blushing at all in any situation and keep doing that until it takes hold. Try it every night before drifting off to sleep. Good luck!
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