I'm actually a bit messed up
hahaha
I have a great admiration for "darkworkers" who seem to have it all with a don't care about the world attitude. They make things seem easy. Companies that don't care about the little guy (most of them) and are so successful... basically taking people to the bank. The end result is they are financially wealthy and the CEO's enjoy their lavish lifestyles. I have a romantic view of the darkworker side... and I sometimes wish I had it in me to be like those people.
After much introspection I realize that I don't have that kind of attitude. I don't have that step-on-peoples-back kind of mentality. I have seen in my own actions doing the opposite, regardless of the kind of image I hold in my head or the image I try and project to the world. My intentions and attitudes mesh with the "lightworker" side of things. I am coming to terms with that aspect of my life and once I do, I know I'll be able to plow ahead and not bother myself with questioning my own intentions anymore.
I am an artist and my goal is to create works of art. I currently work as a 3d artist... but I got into this business years ago because it offered great monetary return. It's more of a technical process for me than an art form. I hope to switch back out of this type of life and become successful as a traditional artist... which is what I wanted to become as a kid anyway.
I know that selling my paintings will provide me with money, and perhaps even large amounts of money... but that isn't the goal anymore with my art. I have a lot of ideas to get on to canvas now, for their own sake.
So... I'd have to say "lightworker" or "love polarized" in the end.
Cheers,
Chris