Have you ever checked out
Flylady? Honestly, this woman 'saved my life' back in 2002 when I was working 84 hours a week and trying to write up my doctorate and my flat was a total utter chaotic not a square-inch to move cluttered den!
She introduced me to the difference between Born Organized and Sidetracked Home Executives and taught me the FREEDOM routines bring you where most of my female contemporaries assumed that it would turn me into a Stepford Wife (albeit single!) it freed me. Took me 6 years to declutter mind you!!! but that led ultimately to me being able to move abroad (something I never had in mind at the time I started!) and allow lots of good new stuff to flow in to my life!
She helps you build household routines slowly, and incorporates stuff like 'date night' for you and your other half if you have one or just you if you don't! Pamper missions and all sorts.
It's a bit sugary sweet sometimes, but I was active on a PayrollSHEs group for several years and we just ignored that stuff and picked and adapted what we wanted.