Here's a male POV on the subject.
When I was in my 20's, I got a girl pregnant who I barely even knew (I'm no longer into casual sex at all BTW; as a direct result of this experience).
I chose to go along with her and abort. She rationalized that she already had two kids and I went along with it; but I knew without a doubt that what we were doing was wrong. The conscience never lies; and mine was telling me that this was as wrong as wrong could be. I had no excuse no matter how much I tried to rationalize that inner voice away.
I could have easily stopped it with less than 5 words had I chosen to. It was THE worst decision I have ever made, hands down. We actually stayed together, got married and had two sons (later separated), and when they came along, the guilt of that abortion ate me alive even more for a very long time. It still does sometimes. I love my kids more than anything in this world and the thought that I would have had another child is still hard to live with. It took at least 20 years for me to be able to forgive myself.
IMO, it's the most evil thing I have ever done, and the worst part is; it's final. You can't go back once it's done no matter how much you regret your decision. Even if she and I hadn't remained together, we could have at least given the child to a family who wanted a a child, but we took the "easy way out". There's nothing easy about carrying around the fact that you had your baby destroyed by choice.
I advise anyone considering abortion to think long and hard, to talk to others who have taken that route and pick their brains, and no matter how bad the situation is, there's always the adoption option. You'll never regret bringing a life into this world even if you have to give it up to a good home, but you'll almost certainly regret destroying one; and that regret can last a lifetime.
I also learned that abortion does not "protect" women in any way, shape or form. It demeans them in a terrible way. Caring for a woman through a pregnancy and raising your child in a loving way is the best way to protect a woman; not allowing her to kill her baby out of 'convenience". There's nothing convenient about having a guilty conscience for years, if not for life.
This is why I support parental consent laws as well. A 14 year old (or whatever age) who has an abortion in secret does not come home the same (an understatement) and I believe that parents have a right to know what's wrong with their child so they can help that child. If they have no idea what that child has been through there's not much that they can do.
I was delivering a job I did to a customer one day about 5 years ago and the business was located right next door to a Planned Parenthood clinic. There was a young girl standing there crying; who looked like she was debating whether or not she should walk through that door.
I walked over and said "hi", and asked if she was okay. She stared balling and telling me that her boyfriend wanted her to abort and she didn't want to because she knew that it was wrong. I told her "You don't HAVE to do what you're considering; there are other options". Then I told her of my experience and how much I regretted allowing it to happen when I could have stopped it. I didn't tell her what to do. I only told her how my experience turned out and that she better deeply consider the consequences.
She told me that she had prayed for someone just to either show that they cared or to talk her out of it and that I must have been the answer to her prayer at that moment. She calmed down a bit and said that she was going to have her baby no matter how hard it may be or if her boyfriend dumped her as a result. She had realized that if he really loved her he wouldn't have put her in a position to make such a huge decision on her own. He wasn't even with her. I then gave her a phone number of a church I know of that will supply anyone with baby supplies for as long as they need them and made her promise to call if she needed anything. I also gave her my number, but never heard from her.
I have to admit that I kinda' felt a little bit 'redeemed" from my own stupid and evil choice; and I also felt good that she hadn't made the same mistake that I had made. I honestly felt that I had helped in a small way to save an innocent life. I think, or should I say; I KNOW that if many women just knew that someone cared and that help was available, we would see fewer abortions taking place.
WE'll never end abortion through legislation. We have to make people understand what it is they're actually doing, what lies they're being told (by omission in many cases, such as the fact that abortion practitioners NEVER mention how people are emotionally affected after the fact), and the benefits of choosing life.
Many young girls (and guys) are looking for unconditional love, and there's no love like the love between a parent and child; at least, that's been my experience. If we just educate properly and honestly, abortion could eventually become an action of last resort. I would advise anyone considering abortion to really do their homework and some very deep soul searching before making that choice because there's no going back once it's done.
Last edited by Betrade; 12-18-2009 at 10:09 AM.