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Originally Posted by Frankie  But! The struggle between the good and evil parts of myself – this is so imbedded within me. I don’t think that it is in my nature AT ALL to embrace inflow and wholly reject outflow nor is it in my nature to embrace outflow and expel inflow. It is in my nature to be aware of both the inflow and the outflow and to try to balance it as best as I can with a heavy emphasis on different situational needs (in other words, certain situations may do best with inflow, and others with outflow). I may wind up treading water a lot of times by doing that. I may not get as much done as I want to get done. But I feel both sides within me so strongly (as part of the very essence of myself as a human being) that trying to become polarized seems like the ultimate self-deception. Intense love and fear – this is part of life. It seems ridiculous to try and assert otherwise. It seems like an enormous lie to myself. |
There are different ways of looking at light, dark, and gray, so maybe my take on this is using terms incompatible with how Steve sees it. But I think the idea of being a "conscious grayworker" will resonate with many people. The main thing is you can't be blind to the polarities -- you have to choose your path purposely and cautiously if you want to live consciously and avoid being a mere pawn.
Lightworkers and darkworkers may see grayworkers as simply confused and disempowered. But grayworkers might see non-grays as stuck in a rut, gaining power at the cost of flexibility. The important thing is to live a life that you can be happy with, and that is congruent with your picture of how things should be. This is where the power comes from, more than which polarity you choose.
I don't see how being a destructive psychopath could be acceptable for anyone. So it appears the distinction is really about self-focus versus community-focus. A gray person is someone who balances the two on purpose, whereas others focus on one and let nature balance the other.
Since focusing on two things at once is oftentimes less powerful, a gray may find it necessary to use single-handling. Thus they may focus on self/ego (inflow) or community/God (outflow), one at a time. Each time, they accumulate the energy temporarily and let go of it when the time comes to utilize the opposite energy.
It may also be that polarity is a function of biological maturity, and thus a 20-year-old who finds gray to be empowering may find that at 30-40 they need to pick a side. But perhaps some people are able to be mature grays, having developed an equal respect for both sides.