[ahimel]

I'm thinking through implications of Steve's latest post on polarization. I think I incline naturally towards the love-based actions, but I can definitely understand the fear-based mentality. That is, given infinite time, money, and skill, what I will choose to do is to help others. But I fear that other people would not make the same choice, and so I don't want others to have power over me - I don't feel safe around other people.

What follows are my thoughts and questions. They are meant to stimulate discussion of the concept, without clogging up the actual thread on Steve's blog post. Anyone is of course welcome to answer. But I think darkworkers will have the best ability to answer, especially the questions about my biases.

It seems to me entirely possible that one could meet the definition of darkworker (fear-based, enjoy power, in it for yourself) and still be a nice person (Star Wars notwithstanding). The classic image of the always-acts-in-their-own-best-interest thief is clearly wrong... because that guy always ends up getting thumped. So it wasn't in his best interest! Especially in a flat world, there's a lot of personal incentive to be nice to people.

So is the opposite stereotype also false? It seems to me that if you're out to help people, it would be extremely hard to be a jerk. But maybe that's the result of my bias -- I'd like to hear from darkworkers on this one. I've definitely met people (been people) who were trying to help but went overboard and ended up irritating the assistee.... but those seem to be fear-based helping... I wanted to be seen as helpful, rather than to help.

It seems to me that one can't be a pure lightworker without achieving peace about the afterlife (whether that's belief in reincarnation, heaven, or acceptance that you will not continue after death) because most fears have their root in fear of death. Fear of not having money stems from fear of not being able to buy food/shelter which stems from fear of starving to death or dying of exposure. Fear of lack of power stems from fear of having others control you, which is really rarely fear that they'll make you sit in a luxurious room and do what you want all day.... it's fear that they'll hurt you. Fear of pain is a valuable evolutionary reflex to keep you from getting killed. Fear of spiders, heights, water, small spaces stems from fear of poisonous bites, falling to your death, drowning, or being crushed. So as long as you still fear death, fear will continue to creep back into your actions. (This was, in fact, a major theme in Star Wars III) What do others think?

How does it feel to be "on the dark side"? Do you mostly fit in, and people only know that you're a darkworker if you tell them? Or do your actions end up being different enough that you get noticed? I assume, given society's approach to light/dark, that you end up being labeled "deviant" and therefore outcast. Are you at peace with that, the way I'm at peace with being a female mathematician? Or do you fear persecution, and build up defenses? Do you get to trust anyone? Or do you hold back even from your closest friends?

Feel free to post your own questions -- we may have to split this off into several threads, but let's start with at least listing the questions here.