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Originally Posted by Illustro Cado  You're not grateful for the food I've given you? Fine, you don't get to eat tonight. You're spending too much time with your gadgets to get your chores/schoolwork done? Off they go, into a locked cabinet. You're gonna swear at me? I'll completely ignore you until you apologize. |
I don't see these as natural consequences - I see them as power plays by the stronger party. (And by the way, I've never seen a parent who has always been completely calm and respectful to/around their child get sworn at by that child.)
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Originally Posted by Illustro Cado ...real world consequences-you will not get invited for dinner if you insult the cook, you won't have money for entertaining gadgets if you never do any work, and people won't stomach somebody that's not pleasant (on some level) to deal with. |
Ah, now THAT'S more like it.
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Originally Posted by Illustro Cado Parents that are scared to death of becoming the bad guy end up sheltering their kids from cause and effect and the result is social dysfunction....
...you're there to protect them from doing any long-term damage to themselves |
These interesting paradigms are why much parental 'discipline' is actually fear-based parenting.
You don't have to be scared for your children. Honestly. They can handle reality and *real* (not artificially-derived) consequences better than you might guess.