Quote:
Originally Posted by The Big D  While popularizing the concept of the "friends ladder" was clearly the crowning achievement of ladder theory, it's not what's really relevant to this thread. What is relevant is the concept of the "ladder disparity": The Ladder Theory
This is the situation where one partner is very attracted to the other, but the reverse is not true. The result is EXACTLY the type of unbalanced relationship the OP describes, with the less attracted partner in the dominant role. |
I don't necessarily agree - I believe the OP's relationship is likely much less unbalanced than she has perceived; the very fact that her BF still considers himself her BF, and pays attention to her distress (by agreeing to 'change') and clearly treats her well, outside of her perception that his pointing out attractive women is an attack against her.
On another forum, one populated overwhelmingly by self-defeating 'Ladder Theorists', I spent many hours trying to help them to realize that 'Ladder Theory' is intrinsically solipsistic, and that if the FRAME of ladder theory is abandoned, it is entirely possible to enjoy perpetual sexually-enhanced friendships, (as I have done my whole life.) Please check out the specific
thread (as I'm hoping not to have to repeat everything over here!
)
Johnny Soporno
Sexual Revolutionary