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Quote:
Originally Posted by Steve Pavlina  Our relationship continues although the marriage is ending. |
I am not implying that you are a failure, your and Erin's relationship is a failure, or that your relationship is over. In fact, I'm certain that none of those are the case.
I am simply stating that, if we agree that one of the defining characteristics of the marriage commitment is remaining married "till death do us part" - not as two people in a relationship that changes forms over time - the marriage will have failed when it ends, in the sense that it will have failed to live up to that commitment.
To be direct, my point is really not focused toward the marriage at all; it is focused toward a mindset I've observed throughout many self-improvement and spirituality types (myself being included in those groupings btw). I've observed a need to explain everything so that it fits into this neat little picture of how we see ourselves and the world: there are no bad things, everything is spun as positive in some way - part of some greater good or truth. The funny thing is that I agree with that premise, but I don't agree with (what I perceive to be) people using that premise to avoid the reality of a situation - which sometimes is truly more pain than pleasure, more questions than answers.
Pain and questions don't sell books, fill conferences, or add blog subscribers, but they are an inextricable part of life.