I donīt know if this will be helpful for you or not, but iīll share my personal experience.
I consider myself to be bi, although I have had several boyfriends and only one girlfriend (which was my worst relationship ever! Since she was using all kinds of drugs and just wasnt my type... but he, I thought I was bi, so I should like all girls... I was young
)
Anyway. In my experience I have found that so far I develop very easily feelings of being in love, infatuation for girls, while I feel more lust with men. I am married now to a wonderful men, and most of my long term relationships have been with boys and men.
I decided (after my horrible relationship with this girl) that I would stop considering the gender of people. So far it works out perfectly. I like who I like because of who they are. It doesnīt matter if they are men or women anymore.
Maybe that is an idea for you as well? Stop trying to label yourself or your sexuality. If you like a person, you like a person. If not, then you donīt. If you like a person but do not like the sex with them, itīs probably best to just be friends (if there is no room for improvement). With men or women!
Speaking of sex... although I enjoy making love to women, I do not like oral sex with them. Thereīs just something about it that I do not like. And that is ok. It is just as if I would not like oral sex with a men. You can do it sometimes to please your partner, but you are not obligated to like it just because you are a lesbian or in a girl-girl relationship.