[cylon]

There are so many factors at play, no one couple's circumstances are the same thing. Steve's kids are fortunate in the fact that both of their parents love them. Steve is in a good position to see his children even more than a "regular married dad" would because he works for himself, sets his own schedule, and has the time and resources to see them and travel. Whatever he wants to do. So in the long run the actual quality time he spends with them, may be greater, and more meaningful, than a dad who works 12 hours a day at a job he hates, comes home at the end of the day full of bitterness and and feeling disempowered, with no time even for himself.

I think as long as the kid's parents truly love them, and make an effort, kids are ok.

In my situation, it was my Dad who got custody of me when I was six, if I grew up living with my mother I may have shot myself. But my parents were not amicable in divorcing. I grew up with them both badmouthing each other, through me. Don't have many memories of them actually being together. Whatever they had that was good, was when I was too little to remember anything.

On the one hand I tend to blame them divorcing for my own problems, but then I think of how fortunate I am that they didn't stay together, and that I got to live with the parent that actually cared about me. I had a buddy growing up who's parents stayed together for the children, but they both hated each other. The kids were caught in the middle, and it was an extremely tense "walking on eggshells" environment.... and no kid should have to endure that.

Interestingly, my mother and her FIRST husband (who is the father of my two half-sisters) are extremely close friends, decades after their divorce. They are genuinely friends who just talk for no reason. Whereas her and my father can't even mention each other's name to me without getting a weird look on their face.

In conclusion, all families are dysfunctional and messed up at some level.