Originally Posted by Illkarma
yet i sit and sit and sit and sit.
I read this sentence but all I could see nonetheless was you running, in your mind towards something, away from the now.
As someone suggested, try to meditate, acknowledge how you feel about different areas of your life, accept the way you feel and where you are now, ask yourself why you feel/react the way you do, write down what you don't want as someone also mentioned, and maybe for a moment simply stop looking for the purpose. You're in this state of confusion, but in order to see your purpose, try letting all those thoughts flying around in your mind quiet down.
This is, at least, how I would go about it, I hope you find what works best for you.