Quote:
Originally Posted by spirit4711  Even if he would have sex with another woman, it doesn't mean it's the end of the world, or your relationship. Unless you choose to end it, of course. |
do you mean this as hypothetical, if he would sleep with another woman, but doesn't? whether or not sleeping with another person marks the end of a relationship would depend on which rules were set up, wouldn't it? of course it would be necessary to be sure all involved are aware of the rules. i have found a lot of unpleasant turns in a relationship come from acting on a rule that isn't clear to the other party. (edit: ideally, a relationship should not involve a sense of ownership or obligation, nor should there be any control of the other through arbitrary rules. but most of us do have an idea of what we will or won't accept as behavior, and this is more what i'm getting at by speaking of 'rules.' if you prefer the flexibility connoted by 'guidelines' feel free to use it as a substitute.)
as a woman, i'd like guys to know there's often something useful in that hard-to-get stuff. honestly, i am not really a fan of the mind games, not at all, but i learned not too long ago that it's not appealing if a guy is constantly available in the courting phase. also, when it comes to getting physical, there is never ever ever a situation where 'no' really means 'yes.' and most women aren't crazy about the feeling of condoms either, but if we can suck it up you can too.
guys, i would like to know how it is that guys can seem to become a different person when you're around your friends. sometimes less mature, sometimes different in other ways. what's up with that? (i admit women can seem different with their friends as well.) and is it true that you will sometimes push our buttons on purpose because you think we're especially attractive when we're pissed off?
one more thing comes to mind - emotional unavailability. it's true there are plenty of emotionally unavailable women out there, but i'm wondering if any guys can speculate about the primary reason a guy might be emotionally unavailable. is this something that causes him pain or is it just a player mentality? and, assuming a guy would want to grow out of the emotionally unavailable stuff, what might a girl do to support this effort? (if a woman is bothered by the emotionally unavailable man, probably best to simply cut her losses of course, but let's pretend for the sake of argument she wouldn't want to - and she was too healthy to simply be a fixer.) what might she do to support the man who makes a decision to let go of the emotionally unavailable stuff for his own benefit, not just to please her (or get her into bed)?
speaking of getting a woman into bed, guys, what percentage of your own behavior is motivated by this?