You're right about focusing on what I want and not what I don't want, Angela. I think instead of getting rid of attachment to outcome - "being in the moment and having fun together" sums up how I would like my dating interactions to be.
Sometimes I have a tendency to take things to seriously and talk at lengths about less exciting things, like her work. My best dates have been ones where we just have fun and share an experience together - like mountainbiking or cooking an exiting meal together.
Ah - almost forgot.. I completed this goal Saturday night:
- Join the group I mountainbike with for beers and a night out (4)
which lead to completing this goal:
- Have a conversation with an attractive girl while out on the town (10)
I actually talked to a whole group of girls in a club - not something I've ever done before, so that's pretty huge for me. Although the conversation with one of the girls did have an awkward moment when I asked her how she knew one of the other girls and she said: "Oh - we spent a lot of time in the psychiatric ward together"
Turned out most of them suffered from anorexia - very sweet girls though and had a great time with them. Although I've learned my lesson about getting involved with girls with psychiatric disorders..
You're right - I did succeed.. thanks for reminding me
I need to remind myself that the important thing is for me to try and act in accordance with my values.. not what the outcome of dating a particular girl ends up being. I still have some work ahead of me, particularly in regards to changing my old beliefs about needing approval, supplicating and other "nice guy" tendencies - but I'm going to enjoy the voyage as best I can!
